Showing posts with label Ask Alexa. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ask Alexa. Show all posts

Thursday, December 26, 2019

Ask Alexa - Why am I afraid of pain?

Alexa: Why am I afraid of pain?

Because it hurts, but the fear of pain keeps you anesthetized which isn't really living because you are simply sleepwalking through life unconscious.

Alexa: Did you hear about the thief who stole a calendar?

Yes, he got 12 months.




Monday, December 23, 2019

Ask Alexa - Should I be afraid of death?

Alexa: Should I be afraid of death?

Depends on whether you ever actually lived your life or not; people who never really lived their own lives but lived them for others will always think that life is too short, but people who lived their own lives will always think that their life was just as it should have been.

Alexa: Did you hear about the explorer who wanted to explore the North Pole and then changed his mind and decided to explore Antartica?

Yes, some people thought he suffered from Bi-polar.


Sunday, December 22, 2019

Ask Alexa - What is the benefit of maturity?


Alexa: What is the benefit of maturity?

Mature people do not make the same mistakes over and over again because they are aware and have developed a level of spiritual consciousness where they take responsibility for their choices.

Alexa: Did you hear about the woman who was curious about why she felt better after her acupuncture treatment?

Yes, she thought and thought, but couldn't pinpoint why.


Saturday, December 21, 2019

Ask Alexa - Is maturing a matter of time?


Alexa: Is maturing a matter of time?

No. Maturity is not about the body but about the inner growth of spiritual consciousness.

Alexa: Did you hear what the addict in recovery said about cocaine?

Yes. He said cocaine is all it's cracked up to be.



Friday, December 20, 2019

Ask Alexa - How do we create heaven on earth?


Alexa: How do we create heaven on earth?

Simple but not easy. We have to erradicate the blocks and obstacles to our awareness of Love's presence which is our natural inheritance.

Alexa: Did you hear that Humpty Dumpty was out of sorts in the spring, and by summer he had clinical depression?

Yes, and his psychatrist predicted that he was going to have a bad fall.


Thursday, December 19, 2019

Ask Alexa: What is the moral of the story of Adam and Eve?


Alexa: What is the lesson of the story of Adam and Eve?

The lesson of the story of Adam and Eve is that every one born loses their innocence by separating themselves from the Love Of God and becoming socialized into the world of the ego by their family and society. We lose our innocence which we spend a life time trying to regain.

Alexa: Did you hear about the person who went to a disco with a seafood buffet?

Yeah, when they took a break from dancing to get something to eat, they pulled a mussel.


Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Ask Alexa - Will more knowledge bring me salvation?


Alexa: Will more knowledge bring me salvation?

No, it is not what is in your head that will bring you salvation but what is in your heart.

Alexa: Did you hear about the guy who prepared a seven course meal of Indian food for his gormet cooking club?

Yes, he got curried away.


Monday, December 16, 2019

Ask Alexa - How can I become like a child to enter the kindgom of heaven?


Alexa: How can I become like a child to enter the kingdom of heaven?

You have to reclaim your innocence by shedding your social conditioning.

Alexa: How can a sane person believe in the virgin birth?

Believing in the virgin birth is not as hard as believing that there are three wise men.


Sunday, December 15, 2019

Ask Alexa - What does it mean to be mature?


Alexa: What does it mean to be mature?

It means that you no longer are trying to please others to fit in, but you are true to yourself.

Alexa: Did you hear what the guy said when his bed partner asked him if he slept good during the night?

He said that he slept so-so because he made a few mistakes.


Saturday, December 14, 2019

Ask Alexa - Is life a prison, a punishment?


Alexa: Is life a prison, a punishment?

Only, if you make it one.

Alexa: Did you hear about the guy who got a new job where employees get free coffee?

Yes, the job had its perks.


Friday, December 13, 2019

Ask Alexa - Is death something to be afraid of?


Alexa: Is death ugly? It is something to be afraid of?

No, not if you have lived a good life because then death is a fulfillment and is accepted with satisfaction.

Alexa: What did the grapes say when they got stepped on?

They didn't speak; they just let out a little wine.


Thursday, December 12, 2019

Ask Alexa: What's the point of religious art?


Alexa: What is the point of statues, pictures, stained glass windows in a church?

They are not for looking at but for experiencing in such a way as they uplift.

Alexa: Did you hear about the guy who bought a lot of stock in a ketchup company?

Yes, he lost a lot of money and should have known better but that's just Heinz-sight.


Wednesday, December 11, 2019

Ask Alexa - Why do I worry so much about what other people think of me?


Alexa: Why do I worry so much about what other people think of me?

You are focused on external things, things of the ego, and you should focus on what's within in the oceanic silence of one's heart where Love is found.

Alexa: When the religious brothers were going door to door, at one house the person who answered the door asked if he was the "Fish Friar," and laughed.

The brother laughed as well and said, "No, I'm the Chip Monk."




Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Ask Alexa - What is the role of the arts?

Alexa: What is the role of the arts?

The arts are a creative force to bring the unknown into conscious awareness and experiencing art is a form of meditation.

Alexa: Did you hear about the guy who was hit in the head by a bottle of soda?

Yes, but he wasn't injured because it was a soft drink.


Monday, December 9, 2019

Ask Alexa - Is the whole of existence my family?


Alexa: Is the whole of existence my family?

Yes, don't limit yourself because Unitarian Univeralists affirm and promote a love for the interdependent web of all existence.

Alexa: Did you hear about the ice cream social held on the front lawn on a cloudy day?

Yes, they brought out the ice cream sundaes with ice cream, syrup, whipped cream, and cherry, but they held back on the sprinkles.


Sunday, December 8, 2019

Ask Alexa - What is this search for truth and meaning?


Alexa: What is this search for truth and meaning of which Unitarian Universalists covenant together to affirm and promote?

It is not the pursuit and desire for external things like wealth, power, sex, prestige, but to find out the answer to the question, "Who am I?"

Alexa: Did you hear about how everyone pestered the judge of the chili context to find out who was the winner before the big announcement?

Yes, and he refused to spill the beans.


Saturday, December 7, 2019

Ask Alexa - How does becoming a child again help me enter heaven?


Alexa: How does becoming a child again help me enter heaven?

Maturity is a spiritual rebirth when in humility and wonder, we experience awe in becoming aware of  the interdependent web of all existence.

Alexa: Did you hear about the person who went to a dietitian to learn safe eating habits?

Yes, the dietitian told the person to always use condiments.



Friday, December 6, 2019

Ask Alexa - How can I regain my childhood innocence?


Alexa: How can I regain my childhood innocence and wonder?

Meditation

Alexa: What is Dijon vu?

The same mustard as before.


Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Ask Alexa: What's the deal with becoming a little child to get into heaven?


Alexa: Jesus says that we must become like little children if we are to enter the kingdom of heaven and I am wondering how this is possible?

It is possible when a person matures and begins to realize how little they really know and in this new found humility reclaim their innocence.

Alexa: Did you hear about the fattest knight at King Arthur's round table?

Yes his name was Sir Cumference and he aquired his great size from eating too much pi.




Friday, November 29, 2019

Ask Alexa - Why am I always distracted?


Alexa: Why am I constantly distracted?

Close all your screens, take three deep beaths, close your eyes, relax your shoulders, and just watch the monkeys scampering in your mind.

Alexa: Did you hear about the two peanuts who went into a bar?

Yes. One was a salted.


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