The Moral Unitarian Univeralist - Cardinal sin three: blaming, attack, vengeance

Cardinal sin three - blaming, attack, vengeance

The mission of UU A Way Of Life is to improve spiritual health, reduce immoral and sinful behavior, and work across systems for positive societal change. This article is another in  a series of articles on reducing immoral and sinful behavior. “Sinful” in the context of the UU A Way Of Life is defined as mistaken. The mission statement could read, “reducing immoral and mistaken behavior” but the mistakes being referred to are ones that cause spiritual injury and so we use the word “sinful.”.

The third component of spiritual health is forgiveness. What is the opposite of forgiveness? It is blaming, attack, and vengeance. If we are one with God, and with one another, when we blame, attack, and retaliate, we hurt ourselves.

Gandhi said, “An eye for an eye makes us both blind.”

Jesus taught us to “love your enemies.” What Jesus is alluding to is that our enemies are a part of us. They are partners in a marriage, members of a family, fellow citizens of a community, and fellow human beings on the planet we share. And yet, to preserve our ego, and what we consider to be our personal interests, we blame others for our own unhappiness and in so doing give our agency and our power away. It is in giving our agency and our power away that we make a huge mistake in forgetting who and what we are.

We forget that we are not our egos which are illusions. The ego is something that has been socially constructed. It is not real. To protect it is folly. To pretend that something illusional is real and worth protecting is a huge mistake.

Forgiveness is giving up making other people and things responsible for our own unhappiness. Forgiveness moves us out of the role of victim. Instead of a victim we become an agent of our own holiness and oneness with our Creator, the ground of our existence.

To protect our egos we make the same mistake, commit the same sin over and over again which is to attack, blame, and retaliate for what we perceive as harm to our egos. The admonition is to “rise above it,” “don’t let your goat get gotten,” “turn the other cheek,”  and move on.

To not blame, not attack, not seek vengeance is a choice. Is it in our best interest to harbor resentment, grievance, and a desire to retaliate? All the studies on health, physical, mental, and spiritual show that these negative desires, intentions, and behaviors have negative consequences. We can choose whether to blame, attack, and retaliate or whether to forgive, rise above, and move on to peace, joy, and bliss.

In which choice, forgiveness or blame, do we put our faith? One of the deficiencies in the Unitarian Universalist covenant is its failure to explicitly affirm and promote forgiveness and to prohibit attack. This fundamental principle of spiritual health and sin is overlooked and not explicitly articulated. And yet such a basic understanding of human spirituality which is so fundamental to other world religions, can be recognized and acknowledged when we consider the many sources from which our UU faith is drawn.

To blame is human. To forgive is divine.

The Moral Unitarian Univeralist - Cardinal Sin Two: Meanness

Cardinal Sin Two - meanness

The mission of UU A Way Of Life is to improve spiritual health, reduce immoral and sinful behavior, and work across systems for positive societal change. This article is another in  a series of articles on reducing immoral and sinful behavior. “Sinful” in the context of the UU A Way Of Life is defined as mistaken. The mission statement could read, “reducing immoral and mistaken behavior” but the mistakes being referred to are ones that cause spiritual injury and so we use the word “sinful.”.

The second component of spiritual health is kindness. What is the opposite of kindness? It is meanness, and rejection and abandonment. A Course In Miracles teaches that the primordial sin is our separating ourselves from the Oneness of God thinking that we can be the author of our own lives. It is this separation, this rejection, this abandonment, this exclusion that the ego tells us will make us safe, secure, free, and happy when it does the opposite. It is separating ourselves from the Oneness, which includes each other, that is our greatest sin.

In our modern times this meanness takes many forms such as racism, xenophobia, misogyny, all kinds of “other isms.” We play the game of “me or you.” This game of “one or the other” is not kind and as even little  children we complain that it is “being mean.”

The human tendency is to hoard and not share. We laugh and say, “Hey, it’s numero uno first.” We are quick to project our guilt and blame on others for our own unhappiness. We love to excuse our immoral and sinful behavior by playing the victim or own desire to be “a winner.”.

The antidote for meanness is forgiveness. Forgiveness, in this context, is being willing to give up making other people and circumstances responsible for our unhappiness. Only we can decide who or what is responsible for our unhappiness. Will we blame others or will we take responsibility for our own well being and state of mind? When we blame others we are not being kind; we are being mean.

Our American culture, when you observe our social policies and safety net, and capitalistic and militaristic values is very mean spirited. The United States founded on the genocide of indigenous people and slavery, is based on a meanness to its very core and foundation.

Kindness does not come naturally to us as a people or as individuals. We have been exclusionary, subjugating, and oppressive since our founding as a country. It is only with awareness and intention that we can repent our sinful ways and choose a better way to live.

In what do we put our faith: kindness or meanness? As Jesus said, “By their fruits you will know them.” We reap what we sow. What are we sowing? As Unitarian Universalists we covenant together to affirm and promote the inherent worth and dignity of every person, and justice, equity, and compassion in our human relations. Anything less is what we are labeling immoral behavior and sin.

The Moral Unitarian Universalist - Cardinal sin one: Destructive management of fear

Cardinal sin one - destructive management of fear

The mission of UU A Way Of Life is to improve spiritual health, reduce immoral and sinful behavior, and work across systems for positive societal change. Today we begin a series of articles on reducing immoral and sinful behavior. “Sinful” in the context of the UU A Way Of Life is defined as mistaken. The mission statement could read, “reducing immoral and mistaken behavior” but the mistakes being referred to are ones that cause spiritual injury and so we use the word “sinful.”.

The first component of spiritual health is peace and joy. What deprives us of peace and joy is what is being labeled as immoral and sinful behavior. The primary characteristic of this immoral and sinful behavior is fear. Fear is not our natural state and is induced by many factors; external and internal. Fear is the opposite of love and gives rise to anger, attack, resentment, grievance, and guilt. When anyone is angry at you or you are angry with someone or something else, the underlying shadow fueling the anger is fear. If one is to deal effectively with the anger and destructive behavior it is most helpful to ask, “What are they and/or what am I afraid of?” Managing the fear rather than the anger is the fastest route to peace and joy.

Managing one’s fear to reduce its influence in one’s life requires a lifetime of practice. Fear has survival value for the body, but is deadly for the soul. Learning to recognize, acknowledge, and manage fear requires self awareness. This self awareness arises from feedback, examining one’s own functioning, and intention in managing the fear in a constructive and not a destructive way. The primordial fear is a fear of punishment arising from our guilt of separating ourselves from the non dualistic Oneness and thinking we are the authors of our own lives.

The expectation in a civil society is that a person will mature enough to manage one’s own emotional expression so that they exhibit self control and self discipline. Lacking self control,  external controls are exerted by society such as increased supervision, incarceration, and on extreme occasions death.

Often people use chemicals and mood altering behaviors to assuage and repress their fears. These are temporary and superficial emotional management strategies, often unconsciously employed, which become bigger problems and have more destructive consequences than the original fears the person was attempting to quell.

When it comes to the immoral and sinful behaviors generated by fear one has to choose how to manage the fears. Will one employ the tactics the ego provides or the methods of the Spirit? Jesus tells us that we should love our enemies. Enemies usually trigger fear in us, and in what do we put our faith to quell that fear: attack or forgiveness? The choice is always ours to make no matter the circumstances. Attack is what we are labeling as immoral and sinful, and forgiveness is the path of virtue and holiness.

The moral Unitarian Universalist - The virtue of trustworthiness

In the Gideon Lewis-Kraus article  in Wired magazine entitled "Trust Fails" , Gideon makes a distinction between "trust" and "trustworthiness." "Trust" is a relational dynamic whereas "trustworthiness" is perceived as an innate characteristic. Leaders, governments, and institutions who are perceived as "trustworthy" are much more likely to be effective in leading their followers than leaders who don't have this quality.

The lack of trustworthiness in government since the administration of Richard Nixon and the meme created and perpetuated by Ronald Reagan that government is not the solution but the problem has insidiously crippled the viability of Americans to act coherently and effectively as a nation in the world and at home.

It is one thing for the United States to deny climate change and withdraw from the Paris Accords, and to criticize Nato, and to withhold funding for the United Nations and the WHO, and another to mismanage its public health system to the detriment of its citizens.

The destruction of American trustworthiness domestically and internationally drastically undermines American self-efficacy leading to the spread of contagion, destruction, and death whether it is from Covid-19, climate change, unregulated corporate functioning or faith in our political processes through voter suppression and legal corruption.

What will it take to restore integrity and trustworthiness to our social institutions on which we all depend for our joint welfare? It is not a matter of intelligence but a matter or moral character, and the major component of that moral character may be trustworthiness. Should this characteristic of trustworthiness be a major criterion in voting for people running for office and selecting people who lead our major corporations and community organizations?

The moral Unitarian Univeralist - MAGA values and beliefs are in direct contradiction with UU principles

Donald J. Trump and his supporters advocate for white supremist ideas of authoritarian dominance of one race and nationality over another. This is a violation of Unitarian Univeralist principles which affirm and promote the inherent worth and dignity of every person, and justice, equity, and compassion in human relations.

MAGA values and beliefs are in direct contradiction to UU principles.

The moral Unitarian Universalist - the racist criminal justice system in the U.S.

"My son-in-law is a police officer and he isn't like that! He's a good man."

Common defense of white people of a system badly in need of reform. Such defensive comments exemplify a total lack of understanding of the problem.

The problem is not about individual behavior but about a dysfunctional system that supports the individual's behavior when it's bad.

Which leads to the question of "What's wrong with policing in America?"

Let's stop getting outraged over individual behavior in specific incidences and look at patterns of behavior over a period a time.

Is policing in the United States racist?

The evidence is plain to see for anyone who wants to look.

The moral Unitarian Universalist has covenanted together to affirm and promote the responsible search for truth and meaning. All too often this principle is only enacted when what is heard agrees with what one thinks.

UUs are as defensive as anyone when it comes to their core beliefs being challenged. We immediately want to defend ourselves and our loved ones even when they participate in systems that generate and condone racist and violent behavior.

There is no system in the United States that is as violent and kills and injures more people than our criminal justice system. The whole system is long overdue for a major overhaul. All citizens, but especially Unitarian Univeralists, have an obligation to do an objective and impartial assessment of the system and then do what they can to change it for the better.

Two things we can do immediately are:

1. Support community police accountability boards
2. Move to restorative rather than adversarial criminal justice system.

The moral Unitarian Univeralist - Failure to plan

Failure to plan

The Boy Scout motto was “Be prepared.” Grandma said, “A stitch in time saves nine.” Grandpa said, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” My boss said, “Plan your work and work your plan.”

W. Edwards Deming, the Total Quality Management guru said, “If you don’t know where you’re going any road will take you there.”

When we are children we want to depend on our parents to know what they’re doing and to keep us safe. If they do know what they’re doing we learn to trust and feel secure. If they don’t we become anxious and put a wall up around us.

We we are adults we want to believe that the people who have authority over the various aspects of our lives know what they are doing and working in behalf of our and the community’s best interest.

Leaders, whether they are the heads of households, supervisors at work, pastors, teachers, and professionals we depend on to provide ethical.effective and efficient services, have a moral responsibility to take their duties to others seriously and to do their best when performing them.

Incompetence is one thing, but failure to perform because of a lack of planning, discipline or will is immoral behavior.

.“I couldn’t help it.” It wasn’t my fault, it was theirs,” “What about them?” “The devil made me do it.” “Mistakes were made.” “It could have been far worse…” So many excuses, so many minimizations, so much responsibility avoiding, and responsibility shifting, and dereliction of duty. The resulting suffering, grief, injury, destruction, and death are enormous.

We live in a society of responsibility avoiders. Our legal system is based on it. Everyone is innocent until they can be proven beyond a reasonable doubt to be guilty. The system is rigged and people with power, money, and status usually escape culpability. They hire good attorneys, public relations reputation control specialists. They find self books and counselors who will find their past, trauma, family history, or some other factor to blame to get them off the hook.

The moral person takes responsibility, admits their mistakes, is willing to assess the harm and make amends. The moral person assesses the situation and when taking responsibility looks ahead to see to it that things will be satisfying, fulfilling, and safe.

There is nothing in Unitarian Universalism that gives the hope of redemption because Unitarian Universalism does not recognize and acknowledge sin. The Universalist view is that God loves humans unconditionally and so sin, mistakes, irresponsibility is ignored. The eschewing of evil is another of Unitarian Univeralism’s major sins which preclude offering human beings the hope of redemption. This is another reason that the Unitarian Universalist ideological story makes no intuitive sense to most people and its denomination will remain small and irrelevant.

With no sin and immoral behavior there can be no redemption and virtue. With nothing lost there is nothing gained. With no moral compass, plans are hard to make because who’s to say what is desirable and not desirable and with no frame of reference who can feel that their ideas and well being are safe?

Planning in Unitarian Universalism whether at the Association level or the congregational level is very poor. It is tantamount to irresponsibility when those in authority fail to provide a plan that is in line with the ideological story of the reason for the denomination to exist. What is UUs function in the world? What is its mission? What is its vision? How can it achieve success? 

The failure of Unitarian Universalist leaders to plan makes the children insecure and anxiously attached. The membership numbers show it.

The moral Unitarian Univeralist - Is the use of Facebook, and Twitter immoral?

Is the use of Facebook, Twitter and other social platforms immoral?

The use of Facebook, Twitter, and other social platforms is often immoral. Just like other social objects and activities  like guns, cars, alcohol, drugs, sex, it is not the object itself that is immoral, but the use to which its put, its intended purpose by the user.

Just as prohibition didn’t work for dealing with the misuse of alcohol, and abstinence based sex education does not work to limit teen and other unwanted pregancy, banning social media platforms does not work either. However, holding accountable to the public welfare the people who use them in hurtful and destructive ways could be helpful.

Unitarian Universalists covenant together to affirm and promote the free and responsible search for truth and meaning, justice, equity, and compassion in human relations, and the inherent worth and dignity of every person. Measuring the use of social media against the yardstick of these principles immediately allows the observer to determine what social media posts are moral and which are immoral. Which social media posts are virtuous and which are sinful.

More specifically, most of the tweets posted by President Trump and his followers are sinful. They do not promote truth but disinformation. President’s Trump’s tweets often denigrate and demean people and disrespect their inherent with and dignity. President Trump’s tweets often promote injustice, inequity, and a lack of compassion.

President Trump has millions of followers on Twitter. Who are these people that read his disinformation and retweet it? As Unitarian Universalists who covenant together to promote and affirm our seven principles, we need to pay closer attention to who is participating in sinful behavior, not to judge or punish them, but to hold them accountable for the damage they do in spreading ideas based on values that are foreign  to our UU Living Tradition. If nothing less, we can be witnesses for the values we stand for and ostensibly profess to put our faith in.

Bottom line - be aware of how you and others are using social media platforms. These powerful communication platforms require a higher degree of responsibility for communication if they are to be used for good and not evil. Unfortunately, they all to often are used of the later rather than the former. Redemption is not possible if the sin has not even been named. The first step for Unitarian Universalists in saving the world is to name the sin.