Is there such a thing as time?

As a student of A Course In Miracles I have learned that there is no such thing as time. Time, the Course teaches, is merely a mechanism of the ego which gets created to provide a sense of control in the physical world.

I have noticed that time can fly and that time stands still. Sometimes I get a sense that time is timeless.

I get asked often, "Do you have the time?" or I say, "I'm sorry I don't  have the time."

I have said, "I'm sorry I'm late I don't know where the time has gone."

I say at 5 minutes before the end of a therapeutic hour, "Our time is about up, is there anything else you would like to discuss before we finish?" This leads to the observation that time is a commodity and has a value that lawyers and psychotherapists charge for. If I allow a session to run over, often the client will ask if there is an additional charge? I become flummoxed and wonder, "Golly gee, what is my time worth? Was allowing the session to run over worth the time?"

At the age of 72 I think every day about how much time I have left in this life? At at my age I often say, "There was a time when ......"

There of course is transitional time and a time to be born, a time to die, a time to laugh, and a time to cry. A time to come and a time to go, a time for fast and a time for slow. A time for later and a time for now, a time that's precious and a time that's tao.

Kurt Vonnegut said in his old age that he realized the purpose of life is farting around. God bless Kurt! So if anyone told me to do it now, I would gently laugh and say, "Silly man/woman....." 

The beginning of the spiritual journey

Unitarian Universalists covenant together to affirm and promote the free and responsible search for truth and meaning. The true search is inward not outward. A case in point is what happened to Sheila.

Sheila said, "I've been hurt so many times in the past, I've come to expect it. I think there is something about me that people just don't like. I must look like a punching bag to them, because all I get is hit over and over again. I'm at a point where I have very few friends and I don't talk to my family anymore. I just stick to myself. It's safer that way."

Wow! What a wounded person. She has learned how to adapt to protect herself. She is very smart and has learned not to be hurt any more. However, the strategy adopted for protection is very isolating and constraining. It can become very suffocating. Rather than withdraw and isolate to protect herself, might it not be advantageous to learn how to stand up for herself and deflect the blows? My friend, Al, calls this strategy, "spiritual akido."

So, I said to Sheila, "While your withdrawal and isolation works for self protection, it also has some disadvantages of loneliness and the loss of the possibility of love. Might it not be better for you to come out of isolation and when people try to hurt you, you deflect their attack and side step it?"

Sheila looked puzzled and asked, "You mean there might be a better way?"

I said, "Certainly."

Sheila said simply, "Tell me more."

And that was the beginning of Sheila's spiritual journey.

Is God smiling on you?

My fears make me jealous and paranoid.

My insecurities make me hypervigilant and I think I see things that aren't there.

Hell has come into my own head and heart, and I spread my personal hell into my relationships with others.

I blame them for things they didn't do. I falsely accuse them of things which makes them angry and drives them away. I insist that they are doing things to me which they deny and that only makes me more jealous and paranoid and them angry and rejecting.

Where do these fears come from that fuel the jealousy and paranoia?

Yes, I have been hurt in the past. Yes, I have been wounded. Yes, I don't want to be hurt again. Yes, I live my life on high alert, seeing things that aren't there just to protect myself.

I know what is happening to me. I am becoming aware of the patterns. I realize increasingly what that thing is that always happens to me. There was a time when my fears were appropriate. My fears wanted me to be safe and no longer attacked and harmed. My fears back then were a friend trying to help me. Now, fears have taken over my life and instead of helping me and protecting me, they are destroying my relationships and making my life a living hell.

I have come to realize that my fears are no longer my friend. They have done their job and its time for them to move along. I have learned that deep down I am loved by a Divine energy that is beyond any human understanding. It is in this Divine energy that I will put my trust and accept that no matter what happens I am loved and will be okay.

This connection with the Divine energy within protects me and with this new found source of security, I find myself engaging with the world in an open hearted rather then a close hearted way.

I realize that while others have hurt me, God has smiled on  me.

Surrendering to a Higher Power is based on heart felt faith

Unitarian Universalists covenant together to affirm and promote the inherent worth and dignity of every person. From where does this worth and dignity arise, and where does an awareness of this worth and dignity take us?

In Alcoholics Anonymous and other Twelve Step Programs they say, "Let go and let God." "You do your best and God will do the rest." At times, these slogans get shortened to simply, "Let Go," and "Turn it over."

Sometimes implementing these slogans is called "Surrender." "Surrender" is not giving up or avoiding responsibility. Implementing these slogans is a way of asking for help recognizing that there are powers far greater than ourselves in the Universe.

As a child I was taught that I, and everyone else, has a guardian angel who is looking out for me. In addition, I was instructed to ask the Holy Spirit for guidance. When I have done so, it has always helped as long as I let go of any expectations of particular outcomes. I simply have learned to "turn it over" by "asking for guidance," doing my best, and then surrendering to whatever happened after that. After all, what more can one do?

This way of living brings one great peace and joy. This way of living provides one with self confidence, self worth, and a realistic self esteem because one comes to understand who one is, a child of the Divine, who deserves to be here and is entitled to Love. It is in this awareness and understanding that worth and dignity arise. This is a matter of faith. It is not belief. Belief is of the head, and faith is of the heart.

Turning things over to the Holy Spirit for guidance while one endeavors to do one's best brings happiness and peace beyond human understanding.

Dealing with monkey mind

Unitarian Universalists covenent together to affirm and promote the free and responsible search for truth and meaning. Is the search taking you into the external world or the internal world?

How do you deal with your monkey mind? The monkey mind is all the thoughts that come into and out of your mind all day long.

Some of monkey mind's thoughts are exciting and enjoyable and some are worrisome and distressing. They are all the same, really, and come from the same monkey churning them out like hurdy gurdy man.

Have you noticed that if you indulge monkey mind by dwelling on any particular thought it strengthens? Have you noticed if you just objectively and disinterestedly watch it, it passes by and moves on?

Monkey mind wants to distract you from your inner peace. Monkey mind, liked a spoiled child, or dog, just wants your attention so it can enhance its own ego.

How is your time better spent, attending to monkey mind, are relaxing into inner peace?

It takes some effort to ignore monkey mind and to just move past it on your inward journey.

The best way of dealing with monkey mind is just to watch it but like the sign says at the zoo, "Do not feed the animals."

UU A Way Of Life podcast, episode 9, gentleness

When meaning is meaningless

Unitarian Universalists covenant together to affirm and promote the free and responsible search for truth and meaning. On the path of the ego this makes some sense, but on the path of the spirit this search often becomes a fool's errand.

We often think we know what things mean don't we? And if we are honest with ourselves, we also have to admit that we often are wrong. When we compare our meanings with the meanings of other people we often are startled and often upset that we don't agree. We attack the other for being wrong and insist that they agree with our version of rightness.

I told her the glass was half full and she told me it was half empty. She got very indignant and called me stupid and I called her a bitch. She said I was not the person she fell in love with and I started to laugh and said, "Who was he?"

This only made her madder and she started to cry. This made me feel bad, but I was still hurt and angry. Then it dawned on me that we don't know what things mean. I thought of the saying from A Course In Miracles which says, "Would you rather be right or be happy?"

I want to be happy, and happiness is achieved by forgiveness for our own and other people's stupidity.

I said to her, "Honey, I'm sorry."

Instead of crying she started whimpering and then stopped.

A peace started to descend between us.

I decided right then and there that I no longer needed to be right. I realized that being right is the path of the ego which takes one to hell. I realized there is a better way and that's the walk with Love on the path of the spirit. I remembered the line from a famous movie several years ago, "Love is never having to say you're sorry." That's because true Love is unconditional. There are no conditions. True Love is freely given. It does not have to be earned, deserved, warranted. Unconditional Love is given just because it wants to be given.

When we live with unconditional Love there is no longer any meaning because being right about meaning is meaningless.