As we continue to consider the third principle of
Unitarian Universalism, “acceptance of one another and encouragement to
spiritual growth in our congregations,” we might consider a bit more deeply
what this thing about encouragement to spiritual growth entails. For the most
part, it might just entail tolerance and forbearance when it comes to beliefs
different from our own and simply listening and validating the person’s search
for truth and meaning as is stated in UUs fourth principle.
Is this encouragement a peer to peer thing or is it
also a superordinate to subordinate thing? In other words do the elders have
anything valuable to share with the adults, the teens, the children? Is this
encouragement to spiritual growth a transgenerational phenomena based on
chronological age, life experience, or perhaps stage of faith development,
using a model like Fowler’s for example, which has been achieved?
I suspect the encouragement to spiritual growth
comes more from what Edwin Friedman, one of Murray Bowen’s students and colleagues,
called “differentiation”. To what degree has the person become his or her own
person, with a mind of his or her own, able to stand on his or her own feet,
captain of his or her own ship, and master or mistress of his or her own fate? Is
he or she aware of what makes him or her tick or is he or her victimized by
emotional forces and beliefs that he or she is not aware of, does not
comprehend? The degree of differentiation a person has achieved in his or her
life is directly related to his or her mental health and level of consciousness
and functioning. People who take differentiated positions and stands on their
values and beliefs tend, while their positions and stands make cause conflict,
to enhance the functioning and wisdom of the group. This type of “encouragement
to spiritual growth” has more to do with how people participate and function in
emotional systems than any kind of cognitive knowledge that gets transferred.
This growth is facilitated through participation in interpersonal relationships
in which there is some emotional investment where one or some people function
at a higher level of consciousness and mental health than the norm for the
group.
Jesus and his ministry as outlined in the New
Testament is a good example of this kind of encouragement to spiritual growth
where He set an example and continually said to His followers in one way or
another “come follow me.” My favorite story that exemplifies this dynamic is
when the rich young man comes to Jesus to ask what he must do to gain eternal
life and Jesus says simply, “follow the commandments”. The rich young man
replies that he already does that and feels that there is something more and
Jesus says in so many words, “Well, if you are really serious about this, you should
sell all your possessions, give the money to the poor, and come follow me” and
the gospel says that the rich young man looked sad at this response and walked
away.
Spiritual growth is not for everyone at particular
times in their lives. They have been captured by materialism, what A Course In
Miracles calls “special relationships”, and other worldly concerns on the ego
plane which they don’t want to give up. At these times, people involved in
religious activities do so for the social benefits not the spiritual, and so
much time is wasted on congregational participants who aren’t really serious
about developing and enriching an interior spiritual life. When it is offered,
like the rich young man, they become sad and walk away.
It is important to take people where they’re at, not
where we think they should be, ought to be, where we want them to be. We need
to take people where they’re at. It is written in the introduction of A Course
In Miracles, “This is a course in miracles. It is a required course. Only the
time you take it is voluntary. Free will does not mean that you can establish
the curriculum. It means only that you can elect what you want to take at a
given time.”
There are some people in UU congregations who have
been reflecting on, and learned from, the curriculum they have been taking at the
University of Hard Knocks. They may have obtained their Ph.Ds. There are other
people who have only begun, and those who have yet to begin their studies.
Encouragement to spiritual growth requires that we
take people where they are at not where we want them to be or think they should
be. If we are to be of help, we need to have some sense where people are at.
What are the milestones, the signs of spiritual maturity? If we can name them
we can work towards them ourselves and we can assist others. What are the
indicators of spiritual maturity that you find helpful in ascertaining where
you, yourself, and others are at? Are there qualities, characteristics, signs
that would tell us the level of spiritual maturity? Jesus tells us, “by their
fruit you shall know them,” but what fruit one could ask? What kind of fruit
are we looking for? Jesus says simply, “Love as I have loved.” How loving is
your congregation? How is it manifested? How could your congregation increase
and enhance its levels of loving? What could you do to contribute to and
enhance the amount of love in your congregation? Do the elders have more love
than the adults and the teens and the children? I suspect that if they have
matured in the spiritual life they certainly have. In colloquial speech, we
sometimes say that people have “mellowed” in their older age and yet sometimes
their dysfunctional behavior deteriorates further. Chronological age has little
to do with spiritual maturity. There are young people who sometimes get
recognized as “old souls.” Who are the mature souls in your congregation? How
do they facilitate the spiritual growth of the other congregational members?
You seem like an old soul.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the article.